Combat Muffins

 

The Lee M1-C12 (12 Cup) Armed Muffin Dispersion Platform (AMDP) (aka: "The Lee Marvin" or "Dirty Dozen")

The M1-C12 Muffin Disperser is the most technologically advanced weapon in the Army's modern arsenal. This pre-pressed baking form can hold up to twelve 0.75 inch deep, paper or foil, cylindrical muffin liners and provides unparalleled reliability in the delivery of tapered bottom: muffin, miniature cake, or leavened/unleavened ordnance. The C12 is Fire-and-Forget, which enables the soldier to task numerous targets while on the move. But don't be fooled by its confectionary capabilities. This tin is not for cakewalks.

Each cup is precision machined for maximization of heat disbursement for optimum browning of twelve 4.0 oz, asynchronous, 3.25 inch top gauged, concentric-jacketed muffin projectiles. The M1-C12 can be paired with other C12's to maximize a lethal delivery payload for displacement of an enemy. At continuous rapid-fire (taking in to account baking conditions and oven settings), cycling of several C12's can exponentially increase the effectiveness of the weapon.

Measuring only 9.5 x 7.25 x 0.75 inches, the C12 is made entirely of high impact aluminum. The light weight provides for maintaining mission effectiveness while reducing the often weighty logistics burden of the individual combat soldier. Its non-stick coating assures repeated, frictionless, jam-free action in all weather conditions - especially in high temperatures. The crimped edges provide steady grip for even the thickest combat pot holders and oven mitts. C12's can be stacked empty to maximize storage and transport.

The C12 is among the family of Armed Muffin Dispersion Platforms (AMDP's) that include the M1-C24M (24 Cup) Mini-Muffin Disperser (dubbed "Mini Muff") which boasts a more rapid rate of fire at half the muffin caliber; and the M1-C6J (6 Cup) Jumbo-Muffin Disperser (dubbed "Big Muff") at two times the C12 muffin caliber.