Mein Hoden Kampf: Hitler's Huevos

 Worth noting: Nulaid's wonderful "bad egg" advertisement pictured here.  To learn more, go to: www.nulaid.co.za!

April 20th, aside from being the acclaimed day for stoners the world over, was of course the birthday for one of the most dispicable persons to have ever roamed the earth.  That person is none other than Adolph Hitler (the ass of whom was rightly kicked by my grandfathers and their generation).

 

The Daily Telegraph ran a story some time ago about the fact that Hitler, having suffered an injury during World War I (though not a terrible enough injury, some would say) only had one testicle to his name.  The article can be found here: OneBalledBastardofaLink

 

Actually I think Hitler had three balls: it’s just that two of them were in his mouth… and that those two balls also happened to belong to someone else, is also just as likely.  “Goebbel’s Marbles” was, I believe, the secret lovers’ little secret, pokey jokey, prick sprech.  Let's take a look at what Addy and Hermy might have said to one another:

German: “Wo ist mein kleiner Sack der Marmore? Meine Güte! Hat jemand meinen Sack und genommen ein Marmor berührt. Mein armer kleiner Sack der Marmore!”
Translated: “Where is my little bag of marbles? My goodness! Someone has touched my bag and taken a marble. My poor little bag of marbles!”
 

German: “Ich bin suchen eine Kartoffel gekommen. Wo ist die Kartoffel?” 
Translated: “I came looking for a potato. Where is the potato?”
 
German: “Haben Sie den struddle versucht? Ich höre, dass es köstlich ist. Ich mag ihren struddle nicht. Noch macht ich mich pflege ihren ‘huevos rancheros’. Sprechen der Eier, würden Sie sich sorgen zu sehen, welcher elf scheu von einem Dutzend aussieht, wie in meiner Hose?” 
Translated: “Have you tried the struddle? I hear it is delicious. I do not like their struddle. Nor do I care for their ‘huevos rancheros’. Speaking of eggs, would you care to see what eleven shy of a dozen looks like in my pants?”